Balance!

Things go along... and then something happens, and you feel as if you're searching all over again for your footing, for the thing that makes you feel as if you're smooth-sailin' again.  With things going on, I'm feeling as if I'm on a search again -- for something, but I'm not sure what.  A friend who's known me a very long time says I do this every spring, but usually closer to June.

I get the feeling it's time for me to focus on just one thing, one part of me.  I truly want to focus on some weight loss, getting healthier and eating better, but the biggest point of contention I have with that is my lunch period.  Maybe someone out there has some advice, let me describe the situation, or dilemma.   I am supposed to take an hour long lunch.   For someone who spends all day except for that hour on her feet, constantly moving (which is the way of retail), it's a long time.  I used to take my meal in the break room.  But management put a TV in the room.  Folks who care to listen to the TV keep turning the volume up to hear over the hubbub of voices who are all chattering away.  More than 90% of conversations in the break room are about work - and 99% of them are of a complaining nature.  I found it's much too easy to get sucked into that type of convo, and I end up feeling as if my entire "my time" revolved around more work.   I like to go in there in read while I eat.  Reading takes me to places away from the work environment.  With the TV and convos, I tried wearing ear plugs, or my MP3 player - instrumental tunes in my ears while I read.  But dang if folks don't come up and begin a convo with me even then!   Back in January some time, I forgot my lunch and decided to hop into the McDonalds at the front of my store.  A booth in the back, a cheeseburger and small fries to nibble as I read my book and an hour just whizzes on by!   Hallelujah, peace and quiet.  But the next dilemma is eating McD's every day -- bad for my health and waistline!  I tried going to my car to eat in peace, but I live in the desert.  If the sun is out, my car is baking.  Too hot to enjoy much time at all.   I tried walking during my lunch hour: headphones on, steady beat in my ear.  I can walk the entire perimeter of my store three times in 20 minutes.  I guess I could walk every aisle and use up more time, but found that being in an aisle with customers leads to the next issue:  "Do you work here?"  UGH

I keep praying that someone will take over the gym that closed down, right next to the store.  I used to zip over there for lunch, change into workout clothes and get about 30 mins of cardio, loved it!  I'm finding it harder and harder to get a workout time into my schedule.  You'd think being old and single, my evenings are whatever I make of them.... but Nooooooo, I have Sadie, a very needy clingy pug who prefers to dominate my off hours.  Even now, she's standing on the bed, her front paws on the back of my chair while I'm typing this out... lmao, she's a crazy dog ...  having a dog when I'm home alone is nice company, but very restrictive given the fact that I'm gone 10+ hours a day.

I struggle with making good food choices.  I will do fine for 2-3 days, then wham, hangry as all get out and go way over my calorie limits.    How does one find a good balance in all of these things?

I'm sure if there were a simple solution to issues such as these, someone would have already marketed it and made a few billion dollars.  I know I'm not the only one.

Balance... I need to find my balance!