Tired

Tired, so very tired.... That's been the theme of this weekend.  I am finding that as I age, when my schedule is thrown off, it takes longer for me to recover.

I worked a noon to 9pm shift on Thursday, Thanksgiving Day (yeah, thanks BigBox Store) and then a 5-2pm shift on Friday.   I came home that day, took a 2 hour nap, woke up, had supper then back to bed for another 10 hours of sleep.  You'd think after all that, I'd feel a little more caught up.   Nope.

Saturday was a lazy day all around, with very little getting done.  Sunday is my usual chores day, and I had a heck of a time getting up and getting going.  We had frost on the rooftops this morning, it's been very chilly, but I forced myself out of bed at 8:30 to dress and start the day --walking Sadie, of course!  Then headed over to the gym for a 30 minute round on the elliptical machine, just thinking that getting things moving would make me less sleepy.   But I came home and dozed while watching TV.    Will I ever be caught up???

I found a wonderful chiffon duster/jacket that I think will look perfect over the dress I found for The Wedding in April.  I also found a coupon for 35% off (Black Friday/Weekend special!)  Can't wait for it to arrive and see how it looks together.

I did a little bit of paperwork and my laundry today - boring but necessary chores that never quit.  I tried to do a little Tabata training with some squats -- but Sadie kept stepping on my phone screen and stopping the timer.   lol   Silly pup!


I glared at my Christmas Tree, which is in a box in the garage, right over the washer/dryer.  I thought -- for about 2 seconds -- that it would be nice and cheery to put it up.  But I decided against it.  I would put it up in the living room, but I never sit in there.  I work and hit the gym.  I come home, I walk the dog, I make dinner, and then the evening is over, I'm ready for bed.   Maybe when there's a new TV out there and I can watch something interesting....  We'll see.

Until then ... hurry up, January!

Medicine Wheel

For as long as I can remember, I've been fascinated by spiritualisms that don't come directly from religion.  One of them is the Medicine Wheel from Native Americans.  While I don't claim to know a lot about them, there is something about nature, the seasons, that call to me.  I enjoy being out in nature, and have always been a rock collector.  When I read something about a Medicine Wheel being rocks placed in a pattern, I knew I had to read up on them more.

While none of us understand the pre-life, the after-life, or whatever else is beyond our small moment in time on this Earth, one can't help but marvel at the way things line up in what some refer to the Circle of Life.  So I did a little digging, trying to find words .....

"It is widely accepted that the Medicine Wheel is a symbol of life and specifically the Circle of Life.  As well known the circle represents perfection as well as infinites since the circle has no beginning or end.  There can many reasons behind the meaning of the circle itself among Nations. This can range from representing the Sun, Moon, Earth, and the Stars to representing concepts of life, continuity, consciousness, energy, and so much more.  It should be stressed that this is not the same from Nation to Nation and there can be some representation that is very secret."

There are so many different things that could be represented by the four point in a Medicine Wheel:

• "The Four Directions:  East, South, West, North
• 
  
• The Four Seasons: Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter
• 
  
• The Four Stages of Life: Birth, Youth, Adult, Death
• 
  
• The Four Times of Day: Sunrise, Noon, Sunset, Midnight
• 
  
• The Four Elements of Life: Earth, Fire, Water, Wind
• 
  
• The Four Races of Man: Red, Yellow, Black, White
• 
  
• The Four Trials of Man: Success, Defeat, Peace, War
• 
  
• The Heavenly Beings: Sun, Moon, Earth, Stars"

(Borrowed, read more here )

"Native American traditions were not based on a fixed set of beliefs or on an interpretation of sacred writings, but on the knowledge of the rhythm of life which they received through the observation of Nature. And what they observed is that there are no straight lines in Nature. All of Nature expresses itself in circular patterns. This can be seen in something as small and simple as a bird's nest as well as in things much greater such as the cycle of the seasons or the cycle of life (birth, death, rebirth). And therefore, to Native American peoples, the circle or wheel represents Wakan-Tanka ("the Great Everything" or Universe) and also one's own personal space or personal universe.

Native American "Medicine" is not the same as the modern medicine that we think of today. It is not a pill or a procedure or anything else that can be used to improve one's physical health. When Native Americans refer to "Medicine", they are referring to the vital power or force that is inherent in Nature itself, and to the personal power within oneself which can enable one to become more whole or complete.

Medicine = energy = power = knowledge

The most widely used version of the Medicine Wheel comes from the Lakota tradition. At its most basic, it consists of a large or special center stone to represent Wakan-Tanka, the Great Everything, and four smaller stones to represent the cardinal directions (N, S, E, W)."

(Borrowed, Read more here)

I've always been one to say that Knowledge is power -- someone more intelligent or famous than I probably said it first -- but it seems to be true.  Having gained knowledge about these Circles of Life, I felt the need to create my own.  They come in all sizes, you can even have a small one you arrange on a table or desk.  I decided that my own backyard would be a good start.  As I've been a rock collector for years, I have quite a few to choose from, and those I have "relocated" from my travels to my home were a good option.   When I select a stone, it's usually based on shape, content and appeal.  And sometimes just a little intuition that says "take me home", as well.

I walked my yard, picked several pieces, and began making my wheel, placing stones in the Four Directions.  Then selecting stones, I decided on the number seven - seven stones between each larger stone, and seven stones for each spoke.  I said small little prayers as I placed different stones, with whatever came to mind for change, peace, joy, love, etc.

Do I have any great expectations or miracles to come to me within a certain length of time?  Of course not, this isn't like making a wish and blowing out candles.  It's more like finding your way, finding your own peace within - sometimes that happens when we are doing simple things that focus our attention away from "outside world self" and refocus on the person we are on the inside.

Sometimes, we need to get outside our norms
in order to find that which we are seeking.
I think I achieved a little of that today.

Thankful

Thanksgiving is here.  Yes, it's tomorrow, but I'm not feelin' the holiday at all.  That's because for yet another year of the holiday season, I cannot be with family, for I am a retail worker.

This is my 16th holiday season in retail, and my BigBox store is open ... along with nearly every other retailer.  Those select few that close so their employees can enjoy family time?  Those are the retailers that we should endorse, embrace, and spend our money with them.   Home Depot comes to mind -- and come the weekend when I have an opportunity to shop, that's where I'm headed.  (Hope Mom and Sis like tools for Christmas!  haha)

I was vexed all day at work, because this year, for the first time, our store is bent on saving payroll dollars.  Mind you, in order to have a successful "Black Friday", customers need to be able to come in and purchase those special items that have been advertised for the past two weeks - ad nauseam, I might add.   In the past, we have all worked a 40 hour week in order to set up and get things ready for Black Friday.  There would be an additional 8 hours of holiday pay on our paycheck, which most of us retail workers would use on the special discount day to make our Christmas purchases.

This year, they cut our work hours to 32 hours; with holiday pay, we will have our normal 40 hour paycheck -- without any extra spending money to make purchases.  Historically, I have spent $350-400 on that one special shopping day, knowing that I would have a little extra in my check to pay it off.  I was SO looking forward to upgrading from my 12 year old TV to a flat screen.  Sorry, BigBox store, I won't be adding to your sales figures, I will only be making my usual $100/week grocery shopping.   Seems to me like they're ... what's that old saying?  Cutting off their nose to spite their face.   Sure, they're saving payroll dollars.  But that extra $100 you saved in payroll means you won't be gaining my shopping spree of $350.  So did they really save anything???

Sometimes the people who make decisions based on numbers alone don't think about the bigger picture.  (I know our store is guilty of that in many, many different ways!)  Or maybe the higher ups are hoping the numbers will "look good on paper" and their own end of year bonus will be a big one.

But this is one retail worker who is particular.  I have a network of friends who do what I do at other locations, and you know, if I decide to go ahead and make the splurge and update my TV situation, I will spend my hard earned dollars at the store where the store manager looked out for his/her employees, didn't take away that extra day's pay from people who work very hard at a job that isn't very glamorous and doesn't pay all that well.

Maybe this is a sign that I start looking for a store
who's overall outlook is more similar to my own.
It seems logical that I would be happier in the long run.

In the meantime, Happy Thanksgiving to you!
And even though work issues are in the forefront for the moment,
I'm so thankful for my family, my friends and my health.

“We must find time to stop and thank the people 

who make a difference in our lives.”

-- John F. Kennedy

Hellidays or Holidays?

Here it is, the Sunday before "the holidays" officially start.  Or rather, as those of us in retail think of them, "the hellidays".   Getting organized is one of the things I do the weekend before it all starts.  Things I'm not using, things I don't need, things that need to be cleaned - it all gets done so that the heavy duty stuff doesn't need to be done when I'm tired, overworked or yes, even cranky.

I've done all the laundry, even the bathroom rugs; I've vacuumed, dusted and wiped down every flat surface.  Yesterday, I finished off some painting on the outside of the house - only because it was an 80 degree day, perfect for getting things done.   After lunch I'm going to go outside and get things battened down, they are predicting rain during the week.

With a pork roast and some hamburgs all cooked up for the week, the only thing I need to do is cook up my beef stew on Wednesday.  That'll be a perfect thing to come home to after a long night of working the Thanksgiving Day 6pm sale.

Despite all the complaining among retail workers, we all are thankful for our jobs, our families, all the things in our lives that make living easier.  Losing Dad over the past year, I feel the loss of him even more in the holidays.  It's been almost a year, and I still want to pick up the phone and call him, asking advice for how to fix this or that -- and I can't.  All I can do is ask myself "What would Dad do?"  And more often than not, the thing that comes to mind is something he's already taught me, and I can get the job done.

This holiday season, be grateful for your own situation.
Even among bad things that happen, good things are happening too.
May you be blessed during your own holiday celebrations!

Curious Sadie

Pugs are a curious dog, and Sadie has an abundance of that quality.  There's nothing she doesn't want to sniff out and investigate when we go walking.  But sometimes that leads to trouble.....

This morning, early, we headed out to the local Riparian Preserve. Lots of ponds, ducks, birds of all kinds, etc.  Sadie loves to walk over there, we even have a routine of stopping at certain benches so she can catch her breath and sit with Mom for a bit.  (lol yeah, she's a pug alright!)

With the sun high in the sky near the end of our circle through the park, I stopped to peer between a couple of trees, into the sun, over the water, to see if any interesting birds were stopped.  We are a migration point for summer/winter bird stops.  I couldn't see anything, but I heard a "splop" sound.  As usual, I tugged on the leash, thinking Sadie was getting into something.  Her collar had slipped over her head and snapped back at me, leaving Sadie hanging on a ledge of dirt for dear life!  She had a look on her face that said "HEY MOM! Moooooommmmm help ME!"

As much as I wanted to, I didn't grab a photo - my pug can't swim!  I set my camera down, kneeled in the mud and grabbed her by the scruff, dragging her out of the chilly water.  Of course, she stinks to high heaven, and started shivering .... time to head home for a warm bath!

After her bath, and a chewie, we laid out in the backyard sun for an hour, getting her warm and dry; she's now snoozing at my feet.  *smh*  Pugs!  Gotta love 'em :)