Frustrations!

From Forbes:  Difficult co-workers can high-jack your emotions. They trigger something in you that causes you to almost act or think irrationally , which is not exactly a healthy situation in which you can succeed. You may find that sooner or later your exasperation expands until every little thing that person does makes you want to tear your hair out.

• The first step they suggest is to figure out which co-worker it is.   (I have NO problem knowing that one)

From Forbes:  Figure out exactly why this person provokes such resentment. Start by getting specific about your feelings towards this person. Rather than making overblown, blanket statements like “She's the most annoying person on earth,” identify the emotions provoked. Irritation? Insignificance? Disappointment? This list can help you find the right words to describe your feelings.

• Ok.  This person does only as much as need be done in order to keep his job.  He doesn't go "above and beyond" on days when the need is there.  After doing the same job for five+ years, he still asks the same simple questions that he should already know the answer to.  He always "fudges" in his own favor.  When attending an off-site function, he padded his time on each end by 15 minutes.  He's been observed punching in on the time clock 15 minutes early, then sitting in the employee lounge until it's time for him to report to his work area.  

From Forbes:  Simply labeling the emotions has a soothing cognitive effect that allows you to embrace a solution-focused mindset. Similarly, identify the exact behaviors your co-worker does that frustrate you. Move from “I can’t stand being around him” to “I think it’s really disrespectful when she talks over people in meetings."  Zeroing in on what triggers you is the first step to creating a road map to conquer the problem.

Instead of feeling driven up the wall by someone and then just stewing in that vexation, tune into how that action or trait of theirs is calling you to learn a lesson about yourself. Simply trying to be more tolerant of that person isn’t a long-term fix. Leveraging the displeasure they cause you in order to practice self-awareness and become a better leader in the process, however, is.

• This one is more difficult for me.  I'm highly organized and motivated.  I mentally set my tasks to a time schedule at the start of each day, and unless that list is totally railroaded by management, I stick to it as much as possible.  I've tried teaching this trick to my co-worker but there's no effort on his part to attempt it.  

It's not as if there are just annoying little habits -- I have that with other co-workers and we get along just fine.  But when a person is dishonest and has little integrity for his own work performance, it's very hard for me to respect the individual.  My own situation has gone on for more than five years, and I've finally realized that no matter what, he isn't going to change.  

Here's the latest:  On his normal day off, a regional meeting (that he wasn't required to attend) was held at a hotel for the entire region's employees who do my job at other BigBox stores.  Because it was his day off, he showed up in shorts and a tee (dress code is required on the clock!) and I felt that he was thumbing his nose at the management team.  He also "considered himself a guest of the hotel" and helped himself to the breakfast buffet.   Seriously?  Who does that?  Am I wrong?  If I am, someone please tell me!  I realize that in the bigger scheme of things, these are small potatoes.  But this is also the same person who is vocal to everyone sitting in the employee lounge that he's looking for a big ticket lawsuit to slap on the store.  Every time he is talked to about his work ethic and/or lack of following procedure, he takes his "case" further up the chain of command to get his coaching reversed.  And 9 times out of 10, someone along the line reverses it -- I think just to get him off their own back.

Which leaves the same problem squarely in my lap.  

I've a couple of options, because we actually only work together 3 days a week.  I work my tail off to get things prepped for the day before he arrives.  Once he arrives and settles into his work, I get busy on paperwork.  Sometimes, like today, he comes in and leans over and snoops on my computer screen as if he's trying to "learn something".  That's when I close the screen and find a different computer to work at.  

I'm still trying to find options to this difficult working situation.  I've even considered asking for different working hours, to have less time working with him.  4-1pm?  That would be only 5 hours, with each of us taking an hour lunch.... Wonder if the bosses would go for that???  Something to consider.  

Just random ramblings - it helps me find answers!
thanks for listening