Another New Year

Here we are about to move into another New Year.  I don't know about you, but I'm ready to leave 2020 behind!  It's been quite a year - so many changes, so many different rules being put in place to help prevent this pandemic from spreading.  Challenging circumstances can make or break us.  How we deal with those challenges is what helps grow our character, our self worth.  

Each of us deals with each circumstance in different ways.  I know I've had my share of challenges this past year.    A new roof, a new AC unit, my sister died, my dog Sadie died as well.  It's been a challenge to stay upbeat and positive - in fact, some days it's just a challenge to get out of bed and do what needs doing.  But each day, it's what happens, and I'm happy that once I'm up and moving into each day, it feels OK.  I've been hoping for more than that, hoping to feel a bit more happiness.  I know that creating it is my job, what *I* need to do in order to make it happen.  But where does that motivation come from?

I'm finding that using my creativity helps motivate me in the right direction.  Or maybe it's just a better direction.  I'm slowly getting back to doing what I love:  taking photos, working on my scrapbooks and posting family history photos on our family page.   On Christmas Day, I posted an old favorite Christmas photo from our growing up years every hour on the hour - a total of 15 photos.  Each one of them made me smile, and I'm hoping it brought smiles to other members of my family. 

So as we're looking forward to 2021, choose something to bring yourself some joy, choose something that moves you into a more positive direction.   We all have choices, make them good choices for this year.

Bright blessings! 

Merry Christmas Eve

 Here it is, Christmas Eve.  And so many memories came rushing back to me tonight.  Living a full life means that there are *many* memories, but some stand out more than others.  Tonight, it was driving past the Dollar Tree store.  I remember when we had six kids and only one working parent - money was tight, but we still wanted to make Christmas fun for the kids.  They were between 8 and 16 years old, so we decided that we should draw names and then make a family outing to the Dollar Tree.  Everyone was handed their $1 (plus a dime to cover any tax) and had to purchase a gift for the name they drew.  One of the younger boys (Dougie) drew his PawPaw.  He found a toy slot machine because he knew he liked to go to "the boats" to gamble.  We all had a big laugh over that one!  The kids each found a gift for the name they drew, and we all opened them in turn, and it was a big pile of fun.  It wasn't the cost of the gift, or about impressing anyone.  It was the making of a memory that stands out.  And still brings a smile to my face! 

I enjoyed a pizza for dinner tonight, in honor of my son.  It was his favorite meal, and I truly miss him.

Another stand out Christmas for me was the year I was 14 years old.  I *really really really* wanted a 10 speed bike, with racing handle bars.  Mine was orange, and that's what Santa left for me.  It was a truly memorable one!  It was similar to this one!  I had it for years and rode it everywhere, including to and from work in my senior year of high school! 

Sometimes I wonder what memories stand out for my own kids.  Are they the same ones that stand out for me?  Probably not.  One year, my husband bought me a long red dress coat with black suede trim.  I loved it, and wore it until it was worn out! 

In the 90s, I sang in a church choir.  We always did a Christmas celebration with lots of music.  I really enjoyed those times.  But the best memory year after year is being at the Christmas Eve service.  The last song would always be Silent Night.  The lights would go out, and starting with the candles on the altar, everyone would receive a light from the person next to them.  For me, that's the best one.

  

I'm betting that your most precious memories had less to do with pricey gifts than it did with making memories with your loved ones.  Once your loved ones aren't around anymore, those memories become even more precious.

So go out, make memories for yourself, and for your loved ones.

Almost a New Year

 Dear Brian,

It's difficult to think that another round of holidays are upon us.  And to think that I'm going through it without you.  It hurts, but we keep moving forward as best we can.

Another surge of this COVID virus is making the rounds and they're advising that we don't get together with others from outside our own home to keep ourselves safe.  It's making things difficult for some.  I know Grandma misses being able to get together with friends and family, but she's very afraid of being exposed.  I spend about an hour a day on the phone with her, and end up doing a lot of reassuring.  She's surviving though!  

Jake and Haley had baby Josie Lee, and Anthony and Krissy are expecting in May - a girl named Aubree!  It's a growing family, and life moves on.

I painted my bedroom this year, two weeks ago, and happy I got it done early.  I caught a cold, and stayed home from work (SHOCK!!) but I was worried about COVID too. I sat on the couch bingeing on 7th Heaven and taking my temp every hour.  But it seems it's just a cold, and has already gotten better.  Thank goodness. 

I forced myself out to the park behind the library, got a few good shots, but I'm a little out of practice.  It hasn't been easy trying to be .... normal in an abnormal world.  But then, I'm not so normal even on a good day!  

It hasn't been easy going through these days without you.  If you were still here, I'd have no qualms about moving to Calif to take care of mom, and leaving you in the house.  But they were my long term plans, and that hasn't worked out.  I miss you every day, and think of you at least once every day.  When you were 16, you told me you'd live with me forever -- and we both laughed!  But now ... how I wish!  Things will never be the same, never feel normal for me.  I'm trying to follow your wishes and be happy, but it's hard to be happy when one loses a child.    I'll always love you

Missing you every day,

Love, Mom

Hooked on Holidays

Today, with the Christmas Holiday fast approaching, I've been overcome with odd emotions and the desire to do things that are a bit out of the norm for me.  I pulled up some old fav Christian mp3's on the computer and have them running.  I'm in a mood to have the house cleaned and presentable for ... what? Because I'm single, and with COVID running rampant, no one can visit.  So what's the deal?  

Sometimes I can't figure it out, but perhaps it's an emotional connection that's needed, or I'm craving. The word that comes to mind in all of this is "grace".   Not the kind of grace that has to do with how I'm walking across a room, or some kind of courteous goodwill (a Google definition), but more about the grace of God.  I'm not a very religious person, I consider myself more of a spiritual person.  But I was raised in the Lutheran Church, and those roots run deep.   As an adult, I joined an Assembly of God church (over 3000 members) and sang in the choir.  And I really enjoyed that a lot.  Maybe that's the connection that's missing.  

This has been a difficult year for so many, many people and it doesn't seem like it's going to let up any time soon.  So do what you can, do whatever makes you happy, whatever brings you joy.  Because I've worked retail for 20 years, it's become a rough holiday for me; some years, I don't even bother with a tree.  But this year, I put up my tree on Thanksgiving weekend.  And it makes me smile every time I come home from work and flick on the lights.  I also choose music that makes me smiles - or better yet, to sing along!! 

As we celebrate the season, let us open our hearts for the joy that characterizes the season.  

Tell your family you love them.  

And smile more (behind your masks!)

Finding Focus

I have always liked reading and writing.  When I was in the second grade I wrote an "Ode to Morning" that described how I heard my father's car driving off to work each morning as "the roar of the Rambler..".  We all chuckle each time we read it.  That was the beginning, but as I reflect back over the years, I regret that I didn't do more with my writing.  But that's water under the bridge .... 

I used to think that Sadie was holding me back from some of the things I used to do more of ... working on my computer with photos, writing, and family tree research.  It's been a few weeks and I'm still trying to find my equilibrium.  My days were structured with Sadie, with no room for anything else.  Now I come home from work and there's .... nothing.  From the time I moved out from my parents' house, it was into an apartment with my husband.  Then kids came, and a different husband, step kids, and animals.  I didn't want a dog, but once I got Sadie, she was my sidekick!  So now, this is the first time I've been alone.  No kids, no pets, just an empty house.  I hope this is an interim, and that I'll get back to doing my own things again. 

When I had a day off last Saturday, I just couldn't seem to get motivated to do anything.  I have put a temporary hold on prepping things for a move should it be needed, and working holidays in retail puts me in a cranky mood most days.  I know I shouldn't feel guilty about doing nothing but sometimes I do. 

I guess it's time for more lists:  things I should do, things I want to do and things I need to do.  Somewhere in these lists of things is going to be more writing.   Maybe that will help me be more focused on my days off. 

It worked in the past!!

Holidays are Hard

 Here it is, Thanksgiving Eve.  Holidays can be hard on everyone, for a variety of reasons.  We all have difficulties with events that happened, or didn't happen, during the holidays.  For me, the death of my son has had the biggest impact. No matter how much time has gone by, it's during the holidays when I feel the ache of it the most  This year, the loss of my sister as well as my beloved pug, Sadie, and I feel even more alone.  Not in the lonely kind of alone. I've always enjoyed being independent and am comfortable with my own company.  It's just hard knowing that things have changed, and won't ever be the same.

Yes, I know, the first thing most people say is "get another dog".  Some folks say that one doesn't replace the one who's gone.   For me, while having a dog was a good comfort and good company, it wasn't fair to her that I would be gone to work for nearly 10 hours a day.  And when I was home, it was chores and a walk and to bed.  I wasn't enough company for her, so the thought of another dog is shelved until my working situation changes.  (May 29, 2026 can't come fast enough for me!!!! haha)

My work schedule is a killer to keep up with during the holidays!  Working retail is difficult enough, but when you add in all the extra items that need to be stocked for customers to buy, and top it off with unhappy customers who are trying to shop and can't find something - well, they can be downright *r*u*d*e* this time of year.  Retail workers - or anyone else who works in a service industry - get the short end of the stick this time of year, and it can take a toll on a person's well being. 

This year, many stores are closing for Thanksgiving Day - but that didn't take the pressure off retail. Instead, I ended up working my normal day off (Weds) so I'm still working a full 40 hours.  On top of it, I have to be at work Friday at 4am so that we're ready for 5am shoppers.  This just isn't fun any more! 

But being that it's Thanksgiving, and time to give thanks, I am certainly grateful that I have a job, an income to support my home.  But I'm more thankful that I still have my mom to talk to every day, that the rest of the family is happy and healthy.  I'm happy that my own health is good, as well.  My heart stress test and echocardiogram results were good, no known issues to be found.  And in the bigger picture, I'm grateful for all the doctors and nurses and essential workers who have kept going during this pandemic.  

2020 has been quite the year, and I'm ready to have it over and done with.  I'm not sure what 2021 will hold, but I'm ready, so bring it on.  May you and your family be healthy and happy during this holiday season!  Stay safe and stay well.  

Goodbye Sadie!

It is with a sad heart that I had to say goodbye to Sadie. 

It was the hardest decision I've ever had to make.  Right before my trip, she got very, very ill after I got home from work Sunday evening.  She has had bouts of diarrhea issues off and on, and it seemed like I could find an explanation for all of them.  Knowing differently now, I wonder if she hadn't been ill longer than I thought.  Yes.  She had a checkup at her vet every six months (because pugs are notorious for having health issues, generally speaking).  She had been to the vet in September and nothing was noted or found.  When I got home, I let her outside; without getting gross, she wasn't doing well at all for a couple hours.  I made an appointment and took her to the vet first thing Monday morning.  Of course, without doing some kind of major workup re: blood panels and xrays, etc, the vet didn't find anything wrong; Sadie wasn't lethargic nor acting ill in any way.  He gave her a shot of antibiotics to cover what might be upsetting her GI system.  And it seemed to be OK.  She ate her meals Mon and Tues night, we took our normal walk each morning.  

On Weds morning, we took two walks before I was taking her to PetHotel.  After she'd been there an hour, they called and said she had bloody urine.  Based on what I'd seen on Sunday, I figured this was just a side affect of the shot, and they said they would monitor her.  Thursday morning, I got a call, she was sick; they took her to their vet office and did first a urinalysis, then a complete blood panel workup.  They found her platelet level so low that her blood wouldn't clot.  It wasn't good and she was so ill that they didn't feel she would survive the night; our only option was to send her to the ER Vet, and they quoted us $2k to see if they could find out what was wrong.  And the vet said that even after spending that amount didn't mean whatever was wrong was fixable.  

There is never a more difficult decision than to say goodbye to your pet.  My Sadie was with me for 8 years.  Today, without her here, I didn't realize just how much having her around made choices about what I do on my days off!!  

I'm sure she's happy in doggie heaven, she'll be romping around with Roxy and the rest of our pets who've crossed over the Rainbow Bridge.  I loved her very much, and hope she's no longer in pain from her illness.

Accomplishments & ECG

It must have to do with my upbringing, but accomplishments are my own personal measurement of good, bad, or ugly days.  I work a full time job, and come home exhausted mentally and/or physically most days, so my accomplishments on my personal time aren't much during the week.  On my days off, I keep lists of the things I want or need to get done.  They keep me on track; it would be so easy to just binge TV on a non-working day and rest.  But I'm never happy when it happens, because I measure my days by my accomplishments! 

Today was a good day for me:  walked Sadie, cleaned my room, cleaned out two drawers in my bathroom and re-lined them with new contact paper along with getting rid of expired and unnecessary items as well.  Then I did the same in my closet, removing clothing that I haven't worn in ages, don't need any longer.  Then I moved on to Brian's room, and created a box for "to be donated" items.  I also got one of the items crossed off my list, painting the board they replaced when putting on my new roof.  

It's been a busy day, and mentally checking things off my TO DO list and counting accomplishments make for a good day.  Which makes me feel ... better about things in general. 

One of the reasons that have been motivating me to be reflective about accomplishments is that I've been having heart tests:  an EKG, a treadmill test and this week, an echo cardiogram.  I could 'see' my heart beating on the screen.  The tech turned the volume on a few times and I could hear my own heart beating as I lay on the exam table.  Techs won't tell you that things are fine, nor will they mention a problem they may have noticed.  They just do the test and forward it to the doc.  Now I wait for another 12 days until my appointment with him.   I don't wait very well, as I get older, my patience isn't what it used to be.  

Until then, I'll just keep working on my TO DO list, racking up accomplishments so that I feel good about each day! 

Treadmill Test

The fear of the unknown can produce a lot of anxiety.  And for me, doctor visits are one of those things that can make me a bit crazy.  Today, I had a treadmill stress test.  I used to be a daily gym rat, and still think I hold my own when it comes to walking on a treadmill.  I have my own "Beast" and while I don't use it as often as I should, I do use it.  I walk every day with Sadie, and am constantly on the move while at work.  So a treadmill test shouldn't produce a whole lot of anxiety.  But there was a bit.

I wore my favorite workout shirt that says "Sweat today, smile tomorrow" and my fav Asics.  I walked into the room and the treadmill wasn't what I would call "state of the art" equipment.  Just the walking belt and a hand rail.  Personally, I was hoping it would have controls that *I* would be able to choose speed and incline, but no such luck.  Darn.

The tech hooked me up to all the EKG cords and I was hoping that would be it, but nope.  She also hooked up a blood pressure cuff.  On a good day, I don't enjoy how tight they pump it up, but when my anxiety is up, it feels like it's trying to choke my arm off!   She also explains that the target heart rate goal is 160 BPM. Um ..... what???  In my personal workouts, 150 is about my max.  Ok, we'll give this a try. 

Hopped on the treadmill and she gets it going.  Incline goes up, speed is about 3 mph.  That's the norm for me on a long workout and I thought "I got this".  Then she starts pumping to take my blood pressure and the cuff feels too tight.  Then 3 minutes into the workout, the ramp goes up, and the speed goes up.  Yikes, here we go!  About 5 minutes in, she asks me to read a chart on the wall and tell her what my comfort/discomfort level is.  She's taking my blood pressure again, and here goes the tight cuff feeling again. Ugh.  Then I'm thinking about how my legs are beginning to feel heavy, but worse, trying to get air into my lungs because I'm wearing this stupid COVID mask ......  

She's reading my heart rate out loud to me, 155, 156, almost done .... *walk*walk*breathe* *walk*pant*pant*pant*  .... 157, 158 ... *pant*pant*pant* .... 159, 160!   OK, we're done she tells me, hang on, I'll slow the treadmill.  "Are you doing OK?" she asks me once it stops.  I'm sucking in breaths, trying to slow my heart rate.  And stepping carefully off the treadmill because I'm wearing my reading glasses (which causes a few issues with my depth perception on uneven surfaces).   

Sneaking a peek at the computer chart, it took me 7:50 minutes to get to my target heart rate, and 3:40 to return my heart rate to my normal post workout rate of 120.  I'm not sure if that's good or bad from a doctor's standpoint, but I was happy with it.

 

So if you're being scheduled for a treadmill test, don't sweat it.  It's not as bad as it sounds!

Real LIfe Turnabouts

Life doesn't always take the shortest route to whatever's next, nor does it take the quickest route.  It seems that in most cases it takes the long route, the one that tests our patience, or some of our abilities to focus, to get something accomplished.  And in fact, if you're like me, it drives us crazy as we try to deal with changes or try to maneuver our way around the changes happening.  It makes me absolutely crazy at times!

There are many changes happening at work, and I'm at a strange place.  For the time being, my position is "safe" from the changes, which means my actual job title or any changes aren't affecting me.  However, with the rest of the changes in personnel and positions, my job has become busier!   Which makes me a little bit crazy, especially with the holiday shopping daze fast approaching.

On top of work changes, there are weather changes.  I've lived in the Valley of the Sun for 12 years now, and this has been the quickest transition from summer heat to winter cold.  We went from temps close to 100 to a high of 65 the very next day, and very windy.  The next morning .... frost on the rooftops!   I went from running the AC to needing the heat turned on.  In a "normal" year, we get 30-40 days of weather temps that transition from the end of AC season before starting the heat needed season.  

Being over 60 has also brought other kinds of changes.  I'm at a weird limbo - too early to retire, but wanting to be retired and do something else!  I've come to a conclusion that I need to be living with Mom.  If I was retired, we could be having some fun, hanging out.  I keep bouncing back and forth between doing one thing or the other.  I'm torn about selling my home, but I think it's time to get out.  I've updated everything, and hope I'll get my money out of it.  I should probably update the kitchen counter and sink at the very least.  Maybe I'll get that done in the spring.  

My normal day off is Weds, and work will be closed on Thursday, Thanksgiving Day, so that's 2 days off in a row.  I think I'll be painting my bedroom those days.  Will also be a good time to thin things out and decide on what I want to keep or toss.  That's a toughie for me, but I'll get through it.  

No matter whether you choose Plan A, or Plan B, Real Life always throws in curves, twists and turns, and even sometimes a U-turn.  Which makes navigating this thing called Life a bit on the rough side.  But somehow we all come through it -- one way or another!

Time vs No Time

 As we grow older, our perspective on time seems to change.  When I first bought my house 10 years ago, I still worked the same 40 hour week.  I still had household chores and such to do each week, and yet back then I seemed to find time to sit in the sun and read for a half hour.  I seemed to find time to do some of the things I enjoyed, like crafting, writing, or working on my photos.  

Lately, it seems that I don't take the time, or maybe I don't *make* the time to do those things.  It's like living in some kind of limbo - as if I'm waiting for something to happen.  Sure, I am still doing things; it's not like I lie on the couch eating bonbons and bingeing Netflix on my days off.  But it seems as if my priorities have shifted, or that the amount of caring I put into getting things done seems to have slipped. 

So how do we get that back??

I've tried making lists.  If I write it down somewhere in hard copy, maybe it will "guilt" me into getting something accomplished.  Like today.  I seemed to have lost my "git up and go".  Sure, the laundry got done, the grocery shopping got done, I even managed to begin repairs on a board for my patio overhang that needs to be patched and repainted.  Maybe it's the drive to get things done that's gone by the wayside?

Maybe I've taken on too much.  I know my job at work has shifted several times in the last six months, and reacting to the changes takes a lot more effort than it used to. But that's at work.  What about at home? Where has my motivation gone?  I Googled, and found a list of ideas for what to do when you've lost your drive:

• Change Your Scenery to Take Your Mind Off the Problem.
• Get Back to Basics. Remind Yourself Why You Started.
• Reset Your Focus with New (and Improved) Intentions.
• Choose to Adopt a Positive Mindset.
• Surround Yourself With Passionate People.
• Have a WTF Attitude About Everything You Do.
• Be Patient.

Not each item on the list would apply in every scenario, but admitting one's faults is usually the first step in finding a solution to correcting the problem.  I know that I can (1) lighten up on myself at work and how much I'm attempting to accomplish in any given 8 hour shift.  (2) remind myself why I need to do what needs doing and yes, (3) be patient.   Not every day off work needs to be filled with things that need to get done, so relax a bit, prioritize even, and do what's most important first, leaving a little time for things that are enjoyable.  You only get one life.  Make it count.

Back to the Future

Friday night, and I'm relaxing while watching Back to the Future, now on Netflix.  Back to the Future, the movie, was released in 1985.  I remember going to Oakridge Mall to watch the movie with my husband and my sister and her fiance.  At the time it felt like an odd "double date" but boy did we enjoy the movie!  Michael J Fox was incredible, and so was the music!!  Huey Lewis' Power of Love was a mega hit.  It's been 35 years since it was first released, and I still enjoy this movie!   Christopher Lloyd as the eccentric Doc Brown was perfectly cast! 

It's amazing what memories comes up when you watch an iconic film like this.  In many ways, I feel like I was in my 20s all over again.   So many classic lines in the movie make me smile even when I've seen them several times.  

While I wasn't a huge fan of part II,  I enjoyed part III very much!  Scenes of them in the "old west" with the scheme of knowing things from 1985 and yet still being back in 1885 ....  it's a well written and thoroughly enjoyable movie!  If you haven't seen it, you should.  It will make you smile too! 

Little Steps vs Giant Leap

Little steps are sometimes easier than one giant leap!  When it comes to making decisions ... over the years, I've usually been pretty certain that I'm making the right move.  When I decided that I needed to move to Arizona, the pieces fell into place as we moved through each phase of planning.  When I wanted to purchase a home, again the pieces fell into place.  Each time it was as if it was meant to be.  I didn't have a whole lot of doubts and just forged ahead and it happened.  

But this time, I have so many doubts and am uncertain which move is the right move.  Frankly, I think the best move is for my mother to come live in AZ.  It still means moving to a different house, but that would work for me.  Especially if we moved closer to my daughter and family. 

Me moving into my mother's house just ... I don't know, doesn't seem like it would work.  I have a lot of stuff, but she has WAY more and is even more attached to things.  Getting rid of stuff just isn't in her DNA.  Last night I spent part of the late hours trying to figure out how or where to put my desktop computer.  I use it a LOT and need internet access.  In my home, I have an ethernet cable.  At her house, the router is in the main living room and getting a cable from there to the family room would be nearly impossible.  So then what???  or rather, where ??? 

All my stuff ... what would I do with it?  And living in Cali, not my favorite place which is why I left in the first place.  Living expenses are high.  But having the old family home would be incredible.  Until the rest of the family moves away.   Then what???

Lawd, it's not easy to figure things out.  Except one fact remains:  I'm the one who has to give up her house.  Makes me sad, because this was my 'forever home' in my own mind.  

However, after much thought and a few days later after starting this thread, I've come to a decision on how to give us a little time on making that decision.  I'm going to make more trips to see Mom, that might make things easier.  Maybe she can make a better informed decision if I'm there more often to encourage her.

So with that decided, I'll be able to sleep better tonight, and work on my little home projects over the next two days off work!!  

Sometimes it's all about little steps before the big leap.

Fresh Cut Wood (Day 5)

 Assignment:  Use sense of smell to bring you back to a favorite memory

Being over 60, I could choose a lot of different scents to bring back a memory.  But the one that's the strongest for me is the smell of fresh cut wood.  Growing up, my father was always the 'handyman', repairing things, fixing things, and making things.  One of the things I remember him making for me is a custom wooden Barbie carrier.  It was about 11x14.  It opened into two equal parts on golden hinges.  The left side was divided into three equal sections; it would hold three different Barbie dolls.  The right side was the place to hold clothes. There was a small hook at the top to hang her different dresses, and small compartments on the bottom to hold her shoes and accessories.  It was stained walnut, then varnished to a high gloss.  

When I smell more fresh cut wood, the second thing I recall is when he put shelves on my bedroom wall.  4 shelves to hold my books and special trinkets.  Another thing fresh cut wood brings to mind is building the family room add on.  I was out there as often as I could be, helping him cut and hammer pieces into place.  And after the room was complete, the stone fireplace was stacked with fresh cut wood, to keep us warm on cool winter evenings. 

My son inherited my Dad's woodworking skills.  He became the 'handyman' of the house, and could build or fix things just like Dad.  He worked in the lumber department at Home Depot and when he came home from work, giving him a hug, I could smell fresh cut wood on his clothes. 

If someone made a candle that smells like fresh cut wood, I would buy all of them! It is the most comforting smell to me.  I miss both of them dearly. 

Just One Word (Day 4)

 Assignment:  Think up a word that sparks vivid imagery for you .. or maybe a favorite word, and write about it using the five senses.

I chose the word Serendipity.

Serendipity tastes like a chocolate bar, smooth, creamy texture, sweetness exploding across my tongue.  Each bite brings new pleasures. 

To me, serendipity smells like freshly washed laundry, hung on the line to dry in the sunshine beneath a blazing blue sky with puffy white clouds. 

If I was going to gaze at serendipity, it would be in a redwood forest of trees, the contrast of light and dark, sunshine and shadows; cool in the shade, warm in the sunshine.  The pine needles lining the forest floor release their musky wooded scent as I walk along.

Serendipity is sleek to the touch; like running fingers through the silky hairs of a favorite pet, or across the curved fender of an old car painted black. 

The sound of serendipity as it rolls off the tongue brings to mind gentle rolling hills covered in fresh green grass, as far as the eye can see.  

Writing Through Touch (Day 3)

Assignment:  With dirt or baking soda and a spoon, near a sink.  Close your eyes and pick up the spoon, explore it.  Cover your hands with baking soda or dirt, close your eyes and describe how it feels.  What else could this be?  Wash your hands, feel the water between your hands and the spoon...

I close my eyes and think about the possibilities, and what comes to mind is planting flowers, or in my case, a small cactus.  As my hand closes around the handle of the spoon, it will function as a trowel as I begin to get my hands dirty.  The wooden handle of the spoon is smooth and worn; I've used this spoon many times over the years.  The dirt is soft and spongy; the smell that rises is damp earth.  Breaking up the dirt that has clumped together with my hands, I feel a connection to Mother Earth.  Growing things seems to run in my blood, back through generations of farmers.  Handling the cactus carefully, holding it by the roots, loosening up the root system, it's ready to plant.  With the spoon in hand, I scoop dirt carefully around the cactus that I've named "Spike".  Tamping down the dirt, adding more spoonfuls of dirt to fill the container, tamping it down again.

Cleanup is simple.  Turning on the hose, I rinse my hands under the cool water, rubbing them together, the water burbles out.  It brings me back to my youth, playing in the backyard and getting a drink from the hose, water running crystal clear, with a slight taste of rubber from the hose.  Hands washed, I give Spike a drink and hope he's happy in his new home. 

Food, Glorious Food (Day 2)

Assignment:  I hope you came hungry, or have a great food memory at hand, because today we’re going to practice writing through our taste buds!

When I think about food -- ok, I'll admit, I think of it probably more than I should -- the one day that comes to mind when it comes to food is Thanksgiving.  One of the best holidays of the year:  there are no gift giving requirements.  All that matters is being with family, being thankful for all we've been given during the year, and having a great meal to celebrate.  

When you're young, Thanksgiving wakes you with Mom in the kitchen beginning her day looking at a (hopefully) thawed out turkey that needs to be stuffed and basted, the sound of celery being chopped and sausage frying on the stove.  The smell is glorious, and brings up an anticipation that continues to build from there.  The bread was cubed the day before and is ready to be mixed with the sausage, onion, and celery and stuffed into the bird.  Once the bird is popped into the oven, it won't be long before the smells drift through the house, creating a bit more mouth watering anticipation.

Of course, there's always setting the table - fancy dishes and silverware, pretty crystal goblets that gleam in the light.  Maybe some pretty flowers, or a cornucopia in the center of the table.  Counting out chairs so there's a place for everyone.

Turkey isn't the only thing on the menu.  Mashed potatoes, gravy, yams with those little marshmallows on top... cooked to a golden brown.  The meal is never complete without some kind of cranberry sauce, whether you like it fresh or prefer it to be from a can, holding it's shape and looking like some kind of jello.  And yes!  There's always room for jello.  When I was young, mom made lime jello with shredded carrots in it.  I've never figured out the real appeal for that, but I always enjoyed it. 

For me, the icing on the cake would be the home made rolls.  As a grownup, I'm partial to really good breads, and I think mom's rolls are the reason why.  The smell of bread cooking brings back so many memories of the house I grew up in and the people in my family.  For me, the ultimate comfort food.  For some, bread is just what's holding the delicious insides together.  But I enjoy bread, plain or buttered.  When bread is in the oven, everyone knows it!

No Thanksgiving meal is complete without pumpkin pie with whipped cream.  Some years, we were ready for dessert right after the meal, but most years we were willing to wait a while before trying to stuff ourselves with anything else.  Whether you think of pumpkin as a fruit or a vegetable, when you mix is up with spices and condensed milk, and bake it in the oven, it's delicious.  Topped with some whipped cream (not Cool Whip) it's the perfect end to a glorious meal.