Treadmill Test

The fear of the unknown can produce a lot of anxiety.  And for me, doctor visits are one of those things that can make me a bit crazy.  Today, I had a treadmill stress test.  I used to be a daily gym rat, and still think I hold my own when it comes to walking on a treadmill.  I have my own "Beast" and while I don't use it as often as I should, I do use it.  I walk every day with Sadie, and am constantly on the move while at work.  So a treadmill test shouldn't produce a whole lot of anxiety.  But there was a bit.

I wore my favorite workout shirt that says "Sweat today, smile tomorrow" and my fav Asics.  I walked into the room and the treadmill wasn't what I would call "state of the art" equipment.  Just the walking belt and a hand rail.  Personally, I was hoping it would have controls that *I* would be able to choose speed and incline, but no such luck.  Darn.

The tech hooked me up to all the EKG cords and I was hoping that would be it, but nope.  She also hooked up a blood pressure cuff.  On a good day, I don't enjoy how tight they pump it up, but when my anxiety is up, it feels like it's trying to choke my arm off!   She also explains that the target heart rate goal is 160 BPM. Um ..... what???  In my personal workouts, 150 is about my max.  Ok, we'll give this a try. 

Hopped on the treadmill and she gets it going.  Incline goes up, speed is about 3 mph.  That's the norm for me on a long workout and I thought "I got this".  Then she starts pumping to take my blood pressure and the cuff feels too tight.  Then 3 minutes into the workout, the ramp goes up, and the speed goes up.  Yikes, here we go!  About 5 minutes in, she asks me to read a chart on the wall and tell her what my comfort/discomfort level is.  She's taking my blood pressure again, and here goes the tight cuff feeling again. Ugh.  Then I'm thinking about how my legs are beginning to feel heavy, but worse, trying to get air into my lungs because I'm wearing this stupid COVID mask ......  

She's reading my heart rate out loud to me, 155, 156, almost done .... *walk*walk*breathe* *walk*pant*pant*pant*  .... 157, 158 ... *pant*pant*pant* .... 159, 160!   OK, we're done she tells me, hang on, I'll slow the treadmill.  "Are you doing OK?" she asks me once it stops.  I'm sucking in breaths, trying to slow my heart rate.  And stepping carefully off the treadmill because I'm wearing my reading glasses (which causes a few issues with my depth perception on uneven surfaces).   

Sneaking a peek at the computer chart, it took me 7:50 minutes to get to my target heart rate, and 3:40 to return my heart rate to my normal post workout rate of 120.  I'm not sure if that's good or bad from a doctor's standpoint, but I was happy with it.

 

So if you're being scheduled for a treadmill test, don't sweat it.  It's not as bad as it sounds!

Battling Anxiety

I'm not sure if "anxiety therapy" is something that's real, but it's something that I'm attempting.  Having lived with BAM (Bile Acid Malabsorption) since my gallbladder was removed in 2013, life hasn't been very pleasant.  I have to take cholestyramine on a daily basis to control bouts of diarrhea.  It took two years to diagnose this before I was prescribed meds.

Looking back, I found I was slowly becoming like a hermit, never going places for fear of not finding a bathroom in time.  NOT a fun way to live!  There were days when I couldn't make the entire drive home from work (all of 20 minutes or so) without stopping at a restroom.

Things don't get too bad if I remember my meds the same time every day, and watch what and how much I eat - I try to make sure I take in enough healthy carbs (which usually means I eat brown rice nearly every day!) If there's some place I need to be, I begin planning my regimen a few days before, making sure there won't be problems during an outing.  This, of course, creates the opposite issue, chronic constipation -- and that's almost as bad!

Last weekend, I took myself to Superstition Springs mall, the one I shop at when I venture out to a mall.  It's familiar and I know where many of the restrooms are, so the sense of panic and anxiety are less than other places.

This weekend, I went out of my comfort zone and headed for Arizona Mills. Lived in AZ for 11 years now, never been there before.  It was a very happening place!  many store and places to eat, with a focus on things for kids to do ie: LegoLand and some kind of aquarium.   I was a bit uncomfortable with all the people, but I was able to walk around inside for about 40 minutes! For me ... that's an accomplishment!! 

So whether you call it "anxiety therapy" or something else, it's working for me!
For anyone else battling anxiety, I hope you find whatever works for you too!

The Big Move (2008)

5 day Countdown - Feb 10, 2008

Current mood:adventurous
Well, it's here, I'm finally counting down in single digits how quickly this trip - no, this journey -  will arrive now.  And I started thinking about travel.  Here in Ohio, I've met several women who have rarely been outside the local county, let alone outside the state; several who don't, or won't, drive on the interstates, some who have never been on an airplane.  As one who has always traveled interstates, taken trips and flown a bit, it was a culture shock for me when I first arrived.  Now that I've been here nearly 10 years, I can understand it ... sort of.  But that doesn't mean these women don't have dreams and fantasies of taking off to foreign places, distant cities, indulging in their wildest dreams. 

I want to encourage those women, give them permission to indulge a little!  Take a risk, say yes instead of no.  There's an expression that we've all read...  "the independent woman" or "a woman of independent means" and we usually associate that with women who can take care of themselves financially.  But money isn't the only thing that makes women independent any longer, and lack of it doesn't prevent us from being independent.  What makes us independent is our imagination.  Give your imagination some respect.  Your fantasies of independence, if only for a short while, are like holy whispers of what's Possible. ..... Turn your ear inward, and lisssssten  .....

PS:  on a more personal note, if you don't think there's a bit of fear in this journey of mine, in starting a new life, in a new city, think again.  It can be scary, but the other side of the coin is that it can be a beginning, a new chapter, a real excitement ...... I took a risk, and said yes! 

THAT kind of day - Feb 11, 2008

Current mood:distractable
Four days to go, and a million and one things to do ... so when I arrived home it's like, OK Son, it's supposed to snow tomorrow, so let's get some stuff done... Laundry first.  We each grab 2 loads and head for the laundry room, get them started in the washer.  Then, because he was out, jacket and gloves on, I convinced him we needed to go 'round the back gate into the patio and pull the weeds that is required by our lease "to take with us" .... (lol yes! it totally says that!) But the back gate won't open; send him 'round to the front to get his crowbar, and we finally get the gate unstuck, but it won't open all the way.  So there we are, trying to crack the frozen ground  and loosen some rocks so the gate opens.  AHA!  we got that, and got in, pulled a few weeds, took a load of loose boards to the trash.

By that time, the washers are done, and we go in to get the next loads, hike them over to the laundry room and load them into the washers, moving the washed stuff to dryers.  Darn!  We ran out of quarters, so I hiked back to the apt to get more, toss them into the machines and .. whoops! who has the soap?  Back to the apt to grab the soap, and finally get them started.  Heavens, but its been THAT kind of day.  Same with work.  I figured I'd feel like I was more on a countdown, but it was business as usual.  Which is a good thing . . . no time to think, no time to worry, just getting things taken care of like any other day.  The only minor exception to that was I forgot to check my schedule? I showed up 4 hours early for work.   Yep! its been THAT kind of day!  Hopefully, yours wasn't quite like that!
 . . . . . . HAPPY MONDAY!  Hugs

3 Days & Counting - Feb 12, 2008

Current mood:anxious

Each day passes, and I'm that much closer to loading truck and heading out west.  Today, I made all those phone calls that take up so much time... shutting off the utilities,  --- and making arrangements for the same at the new apt.  In addition, its required that I have renters insurance, so a phone call to my auto carrier, and adding that policy costs $100/year.  Ok, I can handle that.  But, by combining the two policies? I save $74 on my auto. hehehe go figure, for once I get a break!   Now, if only I can figure out what to do about internet services there..... *sigh*  It's all complicated, and crazy.  Right now, I'm paying a total of $35/month.  Can't find much to replace that. Yet. But I'll keep looking.  

It's getting to be a drag looking at all the piles and piles of boxes here .. nothing is where it belongs, and I keep worrying that I'll forget to do something, or misplace something that I'll need right away, and not be able to find it.   Then I keep telling myself that .. things work out for the best .. they will on these things too.   

My folks are driving down from Calif and will be there when I arrive.  I'm sure my daughter and granddaughter will be there, too.  I haven't seen everyone in a year.  So I'm looking forward to this "reunion" of sorts.  HUGGGS to everyone!

just a PS from 2019 .. .we used the dining room to stack all the boxes as they were packed.  Some had been packed and stacked for nearly a year!  As the date got closer, the less things we would need and more boxes were added.  Except for my son's room.  He *told* me he had been packing ... *sigh*