I have been bothered by the personality changes I've been seeing in my mom.
She wasn't the mom who sat and listened if you had a problem. She wasn't the mom who hugged you because she thought you needed a hug. We were kids, we didn't know any different.
And now as an elderly adult, she has changed her ways. She wants a hug every time I see her, and sometimes more. The other day we were watching tv and she held out her hand and said I need you to hold my hand for a few minutes.
And today, I am coming to terms with all this ... crap. I call it crap because it isn't about showing or sharing love. Its her own needs above anything else. Always was. We all just learned to deal with it in other ways, or deal around it. Because we didn't know different.
Yes, I can hug her or hold a hand, but its not with an overabundance of feeling. She's my mom and that's her due as a mom.
I know it will bother me from time to time in the future, but putting it into context makes me able to move beyond it.
And I can be ok with it.
No comments:
Post a Comment