Separation

Today's word - and it just may be the theme for the week - is separation.

I had to take mom meds yesterday, twice, because there seems to be a problem between the center and the pharmacy.  Without her anxiety meds, mom becomes a basket case. 

She gets upset, hyperventilating, crying jags, she can't function without them.  I sat with her for hours yesterday watching her go through the cycle, waiting for anxiety med to kick in. She doesn't recover from the cycle too quickly.

Today, I popped in at 845am, she still wasn't dressed, hadn't gone to breakfast, etc. She is still within the anxiety cycle, even tho she had her meds last night!  She's been asking to just "let her keep meds in her room". No. (The staff will confiscate them and I would have nothing left to bring her.)  And she asked me to stay. Sorry Mom, I can't, I have things to do.  

My plan is to have some separation from her. For my own health.  Its so easy to slip into the good daughter role and put her needs ahead of mine.  But she has a paid staff there to help her. I have no staff. Yesterday I dropped my groceries on the counter, a load of laundry in the washer, to go help her.  

Its time to do my things.     Separation.