... Or am I just lucky???

Life sure has been busy lately.  With some key people missing at work, I've had to do a lot of filling in.  Which means I'm not taking my Plexus as regular as I should, and can't when my "post" is on the other end of the building from the bathroom, and I can't just walk away when I feel the need because I'm helping vendors ..... yeah, not a good combination. 

Over the weekend, I got back on track with my Pink Drink, and taking the BioCleanse and even the ProBiotic.  Along with that, I was able to take some time to sit in my lawn chair and soak up some sun while catching up on some reading!   Yes, I had other things that needed doing, but taking care of me is being put closer to the top of the list these days.

And so the week goes on, business as usual at my BigBox Store.  Until today.  They pulled Elvis into the office for a talk.  Because he's at the limit of coachings, his next one would be termination.  So management gave in - yet again! - and let him off with a warning.  As usual, when being pinned down, this narcissistic sociopath started pointing all kinds of fingers, especially at me -- that I'm not friendly toward him.  Last time I checked "the rules", I have to be respectful, not friendly. 

Management pulled me in for a quick convo as well, told me to "suck it up, buttercup" and put on a poker face, smile and be friendly.  Uh, sorry, not this girl.  I've had it up to HERE with Elvis and his shenanigans for six long years, and if that's the way it's going to be, then it's time for me to do what I gotta do that's best for me.   When I mentioned the particulars about having little respect for someone who doesn't respect the rules, and steals time on a daily basis -- they made it sound like this is the first they're hearing about it.  But I said I would be glad to forward my emails concerning this matter to them as soon as our meeting is done.  *smh*   Does anyone else who works in the retail industry have to deal with this kind of thing on a daily basis?????  Or am I just "lucky" ???




Ok.  this one describes it to a Tee.  An over-inflated ego (that's him) and I'm the supervisor who's doing the correcting and disagreeing (related to job performance) and to him, I'm disrespecting him.   Well, that makes me feel a little bit better, but does nothing to help with the work situation that I'm in.  It's easy to see that no matter what I do, there's no way to show him as much respect as he is thinking he deserves. 

After a little more research, I found a bit of evidence that bosses have a hard time spotting the narcissism because they don't work in a direct line with these individuals.  Everything else points how to deal with a narcissistic boss .... I don't know, just trying to reach out and find some answers.  And not finding much.

The most obvious answer is finding another position within the company, preferably at another location.  But the position I currently hold is specialized, and doesn't become available often.  So it would mean stepping down a level, taking a pay cut. 

And why should I let this bully push me out of a job I enjoy doing, and am very good at??

My thoughts will be churning for the next few days .....

Day 5

Thursday was a pretty good day.  I wanted to jot a few notes about how my eating habits have changed.  I am a lifelong diet conscious person, and have been a member of SparkPeople for 8 years now.  I log what I eat almost every day.  I don't skimp or cheat, or forget to log something.  If I eat an entire Tombstone Pizza on a lazy Sunday, then that's what I log.  If I can't be honest with myself, who can I be honest with, right?  Besides, lie as much as I want about my food intake -- but the scale won't lie for me! 

So here's the trend(s) I'm noticing:   

• I've reduced my calorie intake by 200-400 per day.   
• Carbs have gone from 204 to 89 per day.  
• My fat intake is a bit higher, (I think it's the cheese!)
• My protein went from 77 to 97.  

Significant changes, in my book.  But the best part is that where after lunch when a person usually gets that "3pm crash" and goes reaching for the sugary carbs or snacks, I don't feel the need!  I've also gone from 4-6 cans of Diet Coke a day to 1 per day.  And boy, do I look forward to that Diet Coke with my dinner!  I don't need a second can, I don't need a can to jumpstart my mornings at work.  Another weird side benefit is the occasional ringing in my ears (I've heard it relates to your caffeine intake). 
.
Thurday, Jan 25 daily log:

Thursday, Feb 1 daily log:

It's amazing what changes take place when you start taking care of your health.  We all hear the noncommittal phrases of doing the right thing when it comes to our eating, but we all fall prey to the easy, the grab and go snacks, that seem to fuel our society.  I'm a numbers kind of person, and when the numbers don't lie......  I haven't made drastic changes, just a few little changes to start.  And so far, it's working out well.  Thanks, Plexus Slim ... I'll be starting my day tomorrow with my new favorite #pinkdrink !

Four Days In

So here it is, Wednesday afternoon.  I survived .... no, I thrived! ... on this new Pink Drink!

Having my #pinkdrink first thing in the morning, I definitely feel the effects in the form of not being as hungry as I usually am.  I work retail and am on my feet 9+ hours a day.  There is no "sit down" portion of my job, and I didn't tire out, at least not today. 

Monday was a very hard day, as it was Day 2 without my usual Diet Coke intake, and I had that gnawing headache one gets when you try to cut out your caffeine.  But I powered through the day, drinking lots of water.  No real hunger pangs at all, it was a shock to realize that when lunchtime rolled around, I wasn't constantly staring at the clock, wishing it was time to eat.  By the time I got home, I fixed broccoli and cauliflower for dinner, then walked Sadie for 35 minutes. 

Tuesday was easier, but there was a lag in my step that I noticed around 2pm.  I grabbed a cool bottle of water, took a 10 minute breather to "regroup" and get through the rest of the day.  Every day after dinner - from now until it begins to heat up for summer - I walk Sadie.  Some days, I just don't want to do it, but it was a pleasant diversion to end the evening.  We watched that gorgeous full moon rise up over the horizon!

Wednesday and the day went so much easier!  No more nagging headache, there was a spring back in my step and my day just seemed to breeze on by!  I usually measure my days by my productivity at work, and today was one very good day!   Dinner and then our walk again, I've topped out at 15k steps, and I feel good.  Really, really good!

And we'll see what the rest of the week brings ... I can't wait until Sunday when I can step on the scale .....  I know, I know, I shouldn't measure success by those numbers, but it's ingrained!

Try Something New

Today is a new beginning!  Frankly, every day is a new beginning, a new start, a chance to make a change, and today it's mine!  I'm starting the new Plexus Slim, and am having my first #pinkdrink as I jot down these notes.

Why?  My health.  I have issues with gut health, am currently taking meds to combat the effects of Bile Acid Malabsorption (BAM from here on out)  My liver produces bile acid, and my gall bladder has been removed, so said BA goes right into my system, and irritates my colon with the usual typically bad reaction.  Thank goodness the cholystyramine that I take once a day does the trick-- most days.   With a bit of research, it's safe to assume that while I don't want to reduce the bile my liver produces, I could improve the quality of the bile.  Which sounds like a very weird thing!

Personally, I've found that eating sugary or fatty foods makes things worse.  I also recently introduced oranges into my diet, and those?  are a no-no!  I'm guessing too much acid.  I've also recently discovered that drinking water with higher alkalinity seems to improve things as well. Because of this new PinkDrink, I'm supposed to drink half my body weight in water each day.  That might be just a stretch; however, when I was exercising, I was hitting 100+ oz per day.  So it's doable!

Eating too much also amps up the BA, so "eat small and often" .... but let's face reality.  Changing our eating habits is one of the hardest things a person can do.  Sticking with it is even harder!  Small changes that you stick to over a long period of time seem to be the best way for making a long term change.  We all think we're strong enough to do it! But statistically, it's a very hard road.  And we slip up.  For me, it was the hardest thing giving up "donut Friday" at work.  But I did it.  For about 6 weeks.  Last Friday, I slipped up, and couldn't resist a quick afternoon sugar high.  The end result wasn't fun.

The other thing I know that I need to do is to kick my Diet Coke habit.  Again.  Three years ago when I was on a big exercise kick, I was able to do it.  Nine years ago when I moved from Ohio to Arizona, the money struggle was real and I kicked it then, too.  But I keep going back to it.  Why?  I'm not sure ... caffeine, because it tastes good, or my personal favorite:  I'm hooked on the bubbles! (lol)

My trip to the grocery store each week is usually filled with good intentions, I even make it out the door with healthy choices, but the stresses of the week become too much and my will power loses its oomph.  When I get home and am making the dinner choice -- broccoli and cauliflower just don't make the top of the list when I'm stressed! 

So today, with a weekly plan, and a shopping list in hand ....... off I go to the grocery store!
Wish me luck!

Bees up their Butts

We've all had them, those frustrating days at work where nothing seems to be going right, things that make you question what you've done to make your manager feel as if she can't trust you, and the bottom of that barrel, what kind of new job can you look for?

That's where I'm at today.

At my BigBox Store, I'm in charge of "compliance".  That means following procedures and protocols laid out in regards to certain specific tasks.  At all times, my work area must be in compliance with these protocols.  Many of them are store specific, but the basis of them rests in the hands at federal level, such as the DOT.

I've been in my current position for nearly 8 years.  Much of them happily.  The rules change on a constant basis, I keep myself updated to all the changes, and comply.  Sometimes that means setting aside the daily duties to enforce any recent changes in the current laws or SOPs.  That's ok, I can take those kind of changes.

But when does it become micromanaging from your boss?  It certainly has been leaning in that direction more and more as time goes on.  Is this company standard? or store specific based on our leadership?  I always wonder.  Sometimes I think the grass HAS to be greener on the other side of the fence -- or in this case, at a different store.

So I did a little reading up on micromanaging.  When a boss micromanages, they effectively do three things:  undermine, demotivate and create self doubt.    For me, the self doubt comes from their mistrust in my ability to handle the job, handle the situations that come up.  I can.  But I expect that when a decision has to be made, and I make it based on facts that I know, that my manager is going to back me up, not throw me to the wolves.  Trust is a two way street, and that's not happening for me.

After a sleepless night, I woke up around 2am realizing that I'm afraid to NOT be at work, for fear that something is going to happen and no one is going to follow through correctly.  (that's a whole 'nother issue because my helper, Elvis, doesn't seem to concern himself with compliance ... again, after citing incidents, management did not back me up.)

I let it all simmer in the back of my mind today while I dusted and mopped (rather than getting my normal actual "work" accomplished ... but that's what they wanted ....)  *smh*  Yeah, I think it's time to think about some kind of change.  Not sure someplace else will be better, but can it be any worse?

Someone wrote "We’re living in the time of “what have you done for me lately”. "  And yeah, that seems accurate to me.  No matter how much a person does, no matter how many times you go above and beyond, "what have you done for me lately"?   Case in point, a member of management wanted something shipped out, and I told her it needed to be palletized in order to ship it.  A month goes by and this morning, *I* am called on the carpet because I didn't ship it.  So tongue in cheeky, my mouth got the better of me and I told my boss that "the other manager said she'd get someone to take care of palletizing the item .... guess it's about to be me."     It amazes me that there are some people who never get asked to take care of anything, I assume because management knows the very few people who can actually get the job done.  That's always who gets asked.

I know that I'm just an underling, an hourly paid associate.  But after 15 years with the company, I know a few things.

I keep telling myself that I should just smile, do what needs to be done, and happily switch gears when management gets a bee up their butt .........

But I think they have a whole hive by now! 
Honey, anyone?