Schoolgirl Crush

Way back in the dark ages .... ok, maybe not *that* long ago.  But back when I was in the fourth grade, circa 1969, I got a schoolgirl crush on John F.  He was one of the nicest boys in class, and I passed his house on my walk to school.  I figured out what time I needed to leave so that I'd be walking by his house when he was leaving for school.  Some days, when I timed it right, we walked together!

Of course, it was all one sided, and just in my head, but those schoolgirl crushes were important!  I read that a typical schoolgirl crush lasts about four months.  Yep, that is probably what mine lasted as well.  But it's funny, that first crush seems to be important when it comes to finding love later in life.

While John F and I went through our school years together, and graduated from the same high school, our paths didn't often cross based on our interests and life goals.  But he was that guy always willing to say "hi", one of the nice ones!   Many years later, at our 25th reunion, I'd had my share of drinks and confessed my schoolgirl crush to him!  We had a really good laugh!  (His wife is a great gal, and they're perfect for each other!)



Now, another 15 years after that, social media has brought Wilcox High School classmates together, and we bond and share things on FaceBook.  Today, he sent me a "HI" and it made me smile all over again. 

Yep, he's still one of the good guys!

Class of '77 RULES!

What a World!

Dear Brian,

Today, I scheduled to have a new AC unit put on the roof next week.  And I realized it will be on your birthday.  Another "first" without you.  And it hurts.

I've been following the "12 Weeks of Peace" program put out by NationalCremation.com.  It's been an awesome resource, but the final word on it all: 

• "This is the end of our journey (84 days), but it is not the end of yours. You will grieve, heal, mourn, cry, and recover over and over again for the rest of your life. We spoke earlier about saying goodbye to a loved one in the sense of accepting their death, but you will never say goodbye to them from your life."

I've learned that you will be in my heart forever, and no one can take that away from me.  I also feel it's my job to keep you remembered, by writing to you, about you, and posting on your FB page. 

But all that aside, you're missing a quite intensely scary world right now.  We're on curfews and are supposed to stay home to keep COVID-19 from spreading from person to person.  Businesses are shut down, anything deemed "non-essential" ... I wonder if it's lucky that I'm considered essential? ha!  Maybe more like sacrificial is the correct term?  (lol)  Poor Grandma is stuck home alone because her age makes her that much more vulnerable to the virus ... although all things considered, my own age puts me in that same category! Yikes!

I've been having to make and bring my own lunch to work; I eat at my desk to avoid people in the break room.  Management takes our temp before we start our shift to be certain we're not running a fever.  I also take my own temp at bedtime each night, just as a double check.  After work, I come home and go straight to the garage where I strip off my work clothes and shoes, then take my shower.   I have never lived through anything like this!

But even with all of this going on, you're still in my thoughts a hundred times a day.  Something funny will happen and my first thought is sharing it with you, just like always. 

You're always there with me in my heart,
and in spirit.
Love you always,
Mom