Mediocrity and Men

I'm not sure whether its the financial news that's popping this word up, or if it's related to how I've been feeling about things lately. But the word mediocre / mediocrity has come to my attention several times last week. And it's not a word that we use in every day language! Of course, synchronicity being what it is, when it happens a few times, maybe its time to pay attention!! So I checked my faves:

Google says: moderate to inferior in quality ; average: lacking exceptional quality or ability
second-rater: a person of second-rate ability or value
Wikidictionary says: Ordinary: not extraordinary; not special, exceptional, or great; of medium quality

That's probably the one I like the best. Or maybe that one describes how I've been feeling lately. Not that I'm bad, terrible, etc, just ... not feeling extra special.
Maybe an explanation would help.

Women, in general, tend to think a certain way. When an apology is owed us, if we have to remind someone to say it, it loses some of its meaning. Am I right? Taking this into the chat spectrum, there's a guy telling you how special you are, or maybe says something about how pretty you are, or that you deserve a great guy to take care of you (or whatever the current catch phrase of the day is..... ). Most of the time, I take it for what it is, in the current moment. (Maybe its the old "98% of what you hear is bullshit" thinking...) But some days, it can truly get me down. Not because I don't think I'm worthy (cuz I AM!) but because men are saying the words, and they don't ... or is it can't???... follow through with actions to back that up.

It makes it very difficult to believe one is "special" , "beautiful" or "terrific" if the ones saying it don't stick around long enough to pursue anything beyond "hey baby, wanna fool around". But rather than letting one guy's false words make us feel mediocre, that's when us women need to buck up, draw a hard line, and know that we ARE worth it.

My fave line is : HIS loss. Because that's what it truly is ... HIS loss - for losing what might have been the greatest thing that ever happened him.

HUGS to all the UN-mediocre women out there!
and HUGS to everyone else, too!!

A Date with Scooter

I became single in the month of June. And by September, I had struck up a chat friendship with a gentleman who's nickname escapes me. But, that's not important. Let's call him OhioGuy. (It was probably something close to that.) We'd struck up a chatting thing off and on for a few days before he said he would be in town and wanted to meet for dinner. We had swapped pix, life stories, and all the other things that come up in topics. I was hesitant, but he reassured me. So, after work, I decided to drive on up. He had given me directions to the hotel, and said that I should pull up to the valet parking (ooo la laaaaa, did I feel special!) So, amidst a bunch of nerves and all that, I arrived. And met OhioGuy. He was there, waiting in the lobby for me. He opened the door, said "You must be Linda", and gave me a brief hug. As with every internet meet, you're never quite sure what you'll get ... some folks don't look like the picture they sent, and some do. And while a picture might be worth a thousand words, it's hard to judge things like height if there's no reference point (or the colored, numbered stickers like they have on doorways to 7-11's!! haha) He was a bit shorter than anticipated (not a big deal) but the smile was just as friendly. 

 We walked uptown a couple blocks to a restaurant, and sat down, ordered dinner. Now, first dates usually make me nervous, and eating isn't a top priority, but its what everyone wants to do it seems! Ah well. A few awkward smiles across the table and the conversation starts with simple things ... the drive, what business he's in town for, the usual stuff. And somewhere in this conversation, a few things shock me: First, he's not really single, or separated. (for me, that's a deal breaker) . Then he tells me that everyone calls him Scooter, and always have, and would I call him that too? Well, sure. But. The phrase "Ohhh Yessss Scooter" just has an odd ring to it, am I right? [laughs] But the one thing that convinced me that a one night stand is NOT in order, is that with his white hair and beard (which he didn't have in the pic he sent) made him look very much like my Dad. At this point, I'm pretty certain the evening isn't going to go the way Scooter thought it might!!! 

 After dinner, we go back to the hotel, and up to his room to change into swimsuits, because this particular hotel has a hottub on the rooftop. It's a warm Indian Summer kind of evening, and we have it to ourselves. We're smiling, and talking, and I'm looking at the stars as they pop out into the night sky. There's a gym up here, too, and it's full of men working out. And about 15 minutes later, the doors roll open and all these men are done working out, and check out the temp of the pool (too cold) and several come slip in this huge hottub with us. After smiling and exchanging looks (and oh yes, eavesdropping on their conversation) , two and two finally come together -- they're on the LA Galaxy soccer team. So there's chubby-me, my date Scooter, and 5 or 6 young hardbodies in this hottub. I'm not sure if this is a good thing, or a bad thing. Wait. Its a good thing.... nothing like a bit of eye candy to round out an evening!! 

 Back in his room, we changed into street clothes again. Well, I did. He decided on a pair of loose shorts and a T-shirt. A couple of kisses later, the old "I better hit the road, long drive, work tomorrow" excuse comes out. He walks me down to the lobby, waits until the valet brings my car, and kisses me goodbye. I drive off into the warm night air with mixed feelings. It was really nice to be on a date again, to laugh and be with somebody, but ... this was not The One. lol