F*ck Cancer!

Cancer is one ugly disease. There isn't much dignity left when it comes down to the wire.  I know.  My Dad has been battling colon cancer for more than 18 months.  He battled with chemo and its effects and yes, it's taking its toll.  I admired how well he tolerated it in the beginning.  He has always been a trooper - his Doc called him Superman because of how well he tolerated all he's been through.

But July came around, and after a year on chemo, his doctor told him there wasn't much else they could do for him.  Chemo had kept the cancer from growing, but once chemo stopped... yes, its back, rearing its ugly head, and devouring whatever it can.

It's so hard to watch, to be upbeat in spite of the dire outlook.  But every other month, I have been here, if nothing else but to be emotional support for my Mom.  She's been a trooper as well, taking care of Dad's every little need.  No easy task, but we do everything we can for those we love.

This weekend's visit was on the spur of the moment, and I'm happy I came.  Dad hasn't been eating or drinking, and that's never a good thing.  Yesterday, he sat for so long in his mobility chair that when it came time to get up and hobble down the hallway with his walker, he couldn't.  We had to get him in his wheelchair and back to the bedroom. That's when we knew that things weren't going to be the same.  We got a hospice nurse on the phone and ordered a hospital bed.  It's set up in the living room with a nice air mattress.  We told him about it, and he didn't seem too surprised.

Around noon, he decided it was time to get up, and wanted to hobble down the hall with his walker.  Lucky, his big strong grandson, Jake, had stopped in, walked behind him in case he fell, and got into his chair.  He's resting well for now.  But he's been eyeballing that bed.  I'm not sure if its in a good way, thinking the bed will be comfy and handy to be out here with the TV -- or if he's giving it the evil eye, knowing .......  *sigh*

Fuck cancer - it's one of the most evil things on Earth - and if I have a choice.....  this would not be it!