Thoughts and Prayers

There have been so many well wishers during this struggling time for me.  Ok, so it's more than struggling.  In many ways, it's devastating!  And they're much appreciated.  Mostly.   Well, let me explain.  It's easy to get busy with the task of living, which makes the struggle slide into the background if only for a few minutes or even an hour.  When there are kind words from someone, it brings it all back with a vengeance, and it's almost as if the hurt is very fresh all over again.  I'd liken it to ripping a band-aid off and the sting is fresh.  Ouch!

Out of the blue, I had a note from Josh G.  When we lived in Ohio, our household of six kids was "the place to hang" for the rest of the neighborhood.  Josh was one of those kids who ran with the rest of my brood.  He was younger than most of them, and often quiet, but I remember him fondly.  His mother and I had an arrangement, if you'd spank your own kid for misbehaving, you can do the same to mine.  And I reciprocated!  If she felt one of mine needed to be disciplined, have at it!  And all the kids knew it.  Good times. !

Another out of the blue was from my ex in Ohio.  His son passed away 10 years ago, wow it's been 10 years! Where does the time fly.  But you never really get over losing a child, and he knows that first hand and offered comfort. 

It's amazing how just when you think things are bad, that you're "all alone", someone reaches out and you know that you're not.

For anyone feeling "all alone" right now, my thoughts and prayers go out to you!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!  

I told myself I wouldn't blog today - why?  Because I didn't want anyone knowing, to feel sorry for me - that the "poor single gal" - sitting at my computer, when I should be doing "something else".  But I don't write this because I want anyone's pity, no one needs to feel sorry for me.  

As a divorced single parent, I learned long ago that a holiday doesn't have to be spent on the exact holiday.  For many years, when my kids visited their dad for Christmas, I would hold the celebrations until they returned.  Often times, we did Christmas and New Year's together.  Sure, it made for a crowded day, but that's ok, we made it the best we could, we made it through.

Back when I was a church goer, there would usually be someone who wanted to do something for the singles, having a get together for those who had no where else to go.  It was usually a pretty good time.  But in the bigger picture, single folks who aren't with family today, are home. alone. 

So how does a single person turn that around?  How do you get up and do things that are not "conventional" in the eyes of a world who are coupled up?  I feel very lucky to have Sadie, my pug, this year .....   a built in excuse to be out walking in the park, around the block, or anywhere else.  But you don't have to have a dog to do that.  Take a walk, get out and enjoy nature -- use the excuse that you're walking off a big dinner if you feel the need! 

I've been up for a long time now; since I worked yesterday, and will work tomorrow, sleeping in today wasn't an option.  So I light some scented candles, and vacuumed, dusted and shark'd the living room while The Blind Side plays on DVD.  I'll head out with Sadie after the sun warms the desert, maybe head to my mountain or the park for a walk, take some pictures along the way.  

Take some time for reflection today; remember how blessed each of us are.  Don't fall into the trappings of the media with their preformed ideas of how your "day" is supposed to be.  Make it your own, no matter you situation.  Here's a big HUG from me to you! :)