Today it's that day, the day I turn 60. And it's not anything like I expected it to be! My plan was to be visiting my family in Northern California - to drive there with my son and spend time doing the things we usually do when we visit. Now all of that has changed. I no longer have my son as a traveling companion on these infrequent drives.
It was a rough weekend, getting through one of them where I didn't have family in town, nothing planned and nothing on my plate to get done. Because it's the hottest part of summer here in the Valley of the Sun -- what for us is really like winter, as we tend to hunker down indoors with the AC -- there's not much I can be doing outside. Even working in the garage can be difficult because of the heat. So I try to make a task - just doing one thing is better than doing nothing.
But it's not easy.
I usually make myself some kind of indoor plan -- computer work, scanning photos, family research. But that doesn't hold my attention right now. It's a chore to just focus on one thing. Even watching a TV show can be difficult for me right now.
My heart breaks each time I think about Brian. I am the one that got the last image of him. My mind keeps wondering at how he had the nerve to choose death by suicide. The pain he was feeling must have been huge. I don't know that I can imagine what that felt like. My sadness was huge yesterday, and I haven't slept well now in three days. I suppose that's how it's going to be for a while.
So on this celebration day, I'm going to quietly spend the day doing ordinary things -- work, dinner, play with Sadie. With my wish being that I get some sleep tonight!
Showing posts with label wishes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wishes. Show all posts
Monday, July 29, 2019
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
Thoughts and Prayers
There have been so many well wishers during this struggling time for me. Ok, so it's more than struggling. In many ways, it's devastating! And they're much appreciated. Mostly. Well, let me explain. It's easy to get busy with the task of living, which makes the struggle slide into the background if only for a few minutes or even an hour. When there are kind words from someone, it brings it all back with a vengeance, and it's almost as if the hurt is very fresh all over again. I'd liken it to ripping a band-aid off and the sting is fresh. Ouch!
Out of the blue, I had a note from Josh G. When we lived in Ohio, our household of six kids was "the place to hang" for the rest of the neighborhood. Josh was one of those kids who ran with the rest of my brood. He was younger than most of them, and often quiet, but I remember him fondly. His mother and I had an arrangement, if you'd spank your own kid for misbehaving, you can do the same to mine. And I reciprocated! If she felt one of mine needed to be disciplined, have at it! And all the kids knew it. Good times. !
Another out of the blue was from my ex in Ohio. His son passed away 10 years ago, wow it's been 10 years! Where does the time fly. But you never really get over losing a child, and he knows that first hand and offered comfort.
It's amazing how just when you think things are bad, that you're "all alone", someone reaches out and you know that you're not.
For anyone feeling "all alone" right now, my thoughts and prayers go out to you!
Out of the blue, I had a note from Josh G. When we lived in Ohio, our household of six kids was "the place to hang" for the rest of the neighborhood. Josh was one of those kids who ran with the rest of my brood. He was younger than most of them, and often quiet, but I remember him fondly. His mother and I had an arrangement, if you'd spank your own kid for misbehaving, you can do the same to mine. And I reciprocated! If she felt one of mine needed to be disciplined, have at it! And all the kids knew it. Good times. !
Another out of the blue was from my ex in Ohio. His son passed away 10 years ago, wow it's been 10 years! Where does the time fly. But you never really get over losing a child, and he knows that first hand and offered comfort.
It's amazing how just when you think things are bad, that you're "all alone", someone reaches out and you know that you're not.
For anyone feeling "all alone" right now, my thoughts and prayers go out to you!
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
The Power of a Wish
Have you ever wished upon a star?
Ever tossed a coin into a fountain to make a wish?
(When I asked a good friend of mine this question, I got back
"lol linda, im so poor, if u tossed in a coin, i'd jump in after it." {{hugs D!}} )
Remember being a kid, when the world was full of possibilities?
Before we became adults, we believed we could change our world
just by making a simple wish.
Without basing it on any facts that I could find anywhere... I'm going to guess that all of us have made a wish at one time in our lives, and that a good portion of us have actually wished on a star, or tossed a coin in a fountain. But... how many of those wishes come true? What does it take to make a wish come true?? Some may chalk it up to luck, others chalk it up to hard work. I personally like to believe that its a both, with a dash of faery dust thrown in for good measure.
When I was up in Sedona seeing the Red Rock area, there's a church that's built right into the side of the mountain. Many people tossed coins from the walkway onto the ledge of the side of the mountain. And I'm no exception; I tossed my own coins, two in fact! Did my wish come true? Well... that remains to be seen. However, it's lookin' good so far! (hehehe)
Some say that in order to make your wishes/dreams come true, you should plan it out. Make a list of your wishes, and then list what you need to achieve it. Wish you could play guitar? Your list to make that wish come true might include buy a guitar, and take lessons.
Jiminy Cricket sings:
When you wish upon a star,
makes no difference who you are.
Anything your heart desires
will come to you.
So the next time you see the first star in the evening sky, or perhaps the next time you pass by a fountain and toss in a coin, Make a Wish! It just might come true!
Ever tossed a coin into a fountain to make a wish?
(When I asked a good friend of mine this question, I got back
"lol linda, im so poor, if u tossed in a coin, i'd jump in after it." {{hugs D!}} )
Remember being a kid, when the world was full of possibilities?
Before we became adults, we believed we could change our world
just by making a simple wish.
Without basing it on any facts that I could find anywhere... I'm going to guess that all of us have made a wish at one time in our lives, and that a good portion of us have actually wished on a star, or tossed a coin in a fountain. But... how many of those wishes come true? What does it take to make a wish come true?? Some may chalk it up to luck, others chalk it up to hard work. I personally like to believe that its a both, with a dash of faery dust thrown in for good measure.
When I was up in Sedona seeing the Red Rock area, there's a church that's built right into the side of the mountain. Many people tossed coins from the walkway onto the ledge of the side of the mountain. And I'm no exception; I tossed my own coins, two in fact! Did my wish come true? Well... that remains to be seen. However, it's lookin' good so far! (hehehe)
Some say that in order to make your wishes/dreams come true, you should plan it out. Make a list of your wishes, and then list what you need to achieve it. Wish you could play guitar? Your list to make that wish come true might include buy a guitar, and take lessons.
Jiminy Cricket sings:
When you wish upon a star,
makes no difference who you are.
Anything your heart desires
will come to you.
So the next time you see the first star in the evening sky, or perhaps the next time you pass by a fountain and toss in a coin, Make a Wish! It just might come true!
Wishful HUGS to everyone!
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