i loved

11pm Tuesday night
and i am exhausted
from running
in a dream
from a bad guy
who was trying to
devour and kill me
with torture
and a john deere tractor.

This time, I know my trigger.
I received a text
a part 2 of something
not intended for me.

Why do I let it bother me?
I know in my mind
he's not mine
never will be.

Why do I let it bother me?
I know in my mind
and have said all along
I'd be replaced.

Why do I let it bother me?
I hate knowing in this case
I was a "dumb blonde"
and got strung along.



And then i get mad at me
all over again.  Because
no matter how much i
whine about the situation
what it comes down to is this:
i let it happen.
i believed
i trusted
i loved