New Beginnings, pt 1

It's a warm night here, or maybe just a little more humid than I prefer.  But I can't sleep.  I keep thinking I'm hungry and I should fix a snack.  But technically, I shouldn't be hungry.  And maybe I'm just thinking I need to eat to stop this empty ache I've been feeling. 

Ok, I admit it -- 1 oz of tortilla chips and some shredded cheddar cheese.  Snack time.  Maybe that will help me sleep better.   I tried water.  chocolate.  even a diet soda.  So the chips n cheese had better work.  I know if I dig deep, and admit it to myself, the hunger isn't really hunger.  I'm stuffing my emotions.  *sigh*

A part of it is realizing after talking with a friend and admitting to myself that I'm feeling more closed off than ever, much of it by choice.  Time is passing me by, and I allowed myself to believe in a dream that couldn't happen.  But its time to get over that feeling, to quit lamenting the time wasted, the years that are gone, and start enjoying what's here now. 

In the next few blogs, I'm going to explore "new beginnings".  and am thinking that a "new beginning ritual" on the night of the new moon might be interesting to try.  "Just as we wish for new beginnings as we blow out the candles on our birthday cakes, we can use a ritual on the night of the new moon to create a wonderful new beginning for ourselves that's not only wishful, but fruitful and fulfilling. It can be a clear, beautiful reflection of one's true desire from the heart."

On the next New Moon, sit down with a piece of paper and a pen. Think about the new things you would like to attract in your life. Make sure you really take time to think about it. Please be realistic. There's nothing wrong with thinking big about our lives, but we have to be realistic at the same time. Write down your list of things you'd like to attract into your life. The list might include a new job, new friends, a better attitude towards yourself and others, or a new healthy lifestyle change that fits your personal needs. The sky is the limit with this list.

This will be an interesting experiment, I think. 
What would you put on your list? 
How often do you let yourself think about the wishes of your heart?